K.A.A.N
Ellie
[Verse 1]
And I just lost my mind
I can't believe it
All I ever think about is what I know I'll never be
I'm having nightmares when I close my eyes of me dead in the street
Please let my sacrificial blood drip on this motherfuckin beat damn
All I ever wanted was a second, a minute to kill it
They feeling the realest and the n***as that ever do it
Approval, I'm about to lose it
Confusion as I'm pursuing
A dream that is unattainable
Really wasn't explainable
They tell me never take it in vain
Not to explain the game
Or what it means to go and follow a dream
I've seen many give up when the road got tough
Figured out nobody really gives a fuck
N***a, what do you expect? respect?
You got to understand I'll be coming at your motherfucking neck
And you better come correct
But that is if you want to make it to the top
Realize that the pain don't stop
Got to formulate a plot and a plan I'm hoping you understand
Your destiny's in the palm of your hand
Take control the role that you know you wanna play
Your focus and dedication will never leave you astray
To display the realest of any passion
You was never relaxing
Asking what it takes to finally get a break
The mistake that most people will make
Is believing shit is real when it was actually fake
Can I vent upon the page?
And try to give you the pain
Paint a picture of the problems that reside in the brain
With the man that was living with insanity
Is anyone understanding me?
Vanity is a curse
My happiness in a hearse
I disperse the lyrical content, you converse
Immersed inside a verse to me depicting my hurt
But first ima be honest abolishing any ignorance
I'm polishing the flow and demolishing any evidence
The truth has been distorted
They know it that I'll be peddling and passing my competition
Habitual repetition and with the way I kill it
They want me to get evicted
I bet they start a petition
But I built the definition of factual tunnel vision
I mention on getting a shot
But never the penicillin I'm willing to bust my ass
If opportunities are given you gotta be fucking kidding
I'm dying to make a difference, they lying to make a living
I can read between the lines in the motherfuckin sentence
Said you was never concerned or be preaching within my words
Sacrifice or repentance but not internally burn
[Hook]
Try to make a hit off this anguish that I claim
I put my life inside these lyrics hoping that you can see my pain
With all this agony I feel, I think that I'm going insane
To live forever through the music that's all that I want to attain
FUCK !
I guess it all depends on a mindstate that a young motherfucker n***a's really in DAMN! (3x)
I sit with my thoughts
The page and the pen
I write about life and how it all ends

[Verse 2]
I gotta take my time, so that I can murder your mind
To find inner peace that a n***a never felt
But nobody ever helps
They can never comprehend
The illest of illustrations that I'm giving with a pen
The depiction of my vision was given with a description
But never a contradiction
Admitting to my addiction was only giving me friction
To go and get a prescription
I know it's not the answer, the last man standing
The man in the ransom, and mutilate the game
Insane like Charles Manson, going off of on a tangent
Throwing a temper tantrum
Death will come in a tandem
You probably never seen it
If I gave you the truth I know you wouldn't believe it
My thesis is that I could be one of the greatest that ever did it for ripping the mic
It all changed
They treat it like it's a canvas
I was lost in a trance
The flow was never pedantic
I was tired of your antics
Ya'll been taking advantage
But I'm looking for answers
Gotta make it an anthem
Originality in the fallacy of the fornicated
I was formulated, abated, never debated
I've innovated evasivley
Facing my fucking destiny
How the hell willI I make it?
I'm baking without a recipe
Rest in peace to the beat that remained of what I've wrung
Leave 'em believe 'em
My sounds egregious, enough to cause the bereavement I've seen
That most motherfuckers never want to see you make it
I try to deal with the hatred
And find a way to replace it
That boy could have been famous
And now he's strung out like an addict all day
The pain is a constant reminder
I've gotta use blinders and try to put the bullshit behind us
Your highness is they fittin' to call me
It's KAAN, that's knowledge above all
I said I leave 'em appaled
My god, they all gawk when staring at a reflection
Receptive and kept and I spin it like a weapon
Step in with a different type of mindstate
An automatic spitter but a n***a never breaks
I know you wouldn't relate to the fate of the man with the hope to devote all the time to the craft
The sickest of any rapper
Rap for my power
Never want to devour
Bow down you coward
Leairly I was complicated, concentrated, contemplated
Couldn't even wait for the moment to say I made it
But the time moves slow
And my life's so basic
I said I can't take it
And all I feel is hatred
I roll another blunt to keep me mentally sedated and faded
I said the day may change but it's always the same shit
I'm still suicidal and the Bible don't help
So I guess I gotta do it by myself
[Hook]
Try to make a hit off this anguish that I claim
I put my life inside these lyrics hoping that you can see my pain
With all this agony I feel, I think that I'm going insane
To live forever through the music that's all that I want to attain
FUCK !
I guess it all depends on a mindstate that a young motherfucker n***a's really in DAMN! (3x)
I sit with my thoughts
The page and the pen
I write about life and how it all ends

{Verse 3}
I know I'm going to hell for sins I posses in my soul that your eyes can't see
I recede to believe
There's a possibility that the grief of the green has been coming in between
Will the means intervene if I turn into a fiend for the cream?
Let it consume your dreams
Demeaning as it seems
I'm cleaning out my closet
Consequence of the conscience
The drugs made a n***a brain dead like a zombie
Lost in a depression
Never learning my lesson
Acceptance was the main goal of a young adolescent
With a dollar and a dream
Plus a penny for your thoughts
But nobody ever thinks
Stick around with the ship the moment they see it sink
That's a fucking metaphor
I adore any lack of attention
Dispensing dissension without the attention
Defending my right to ignite {?}
Said I was a mothefucking goner
Couldn't have been wronger
My will got strong but the stress last longer
The pain is a part of the process I must digest to progress
In the midst of the mess that I made
But I'm praying that my lord will save and protect
But I get a good feeling that a motherfucker next
I ain't talking 'bout fame n***a
Speak about death
I'll be ready when it comes
Take the necessary step
Inhale exhale
Take a real deep breath even though I want to die
Thank God I'm alive
Never want to be a n***a that can only say he tried
But somebody that had made it from the plan they devised
And attempts to divide the supply with the people that would ride
Giving everything I got
Doing more to survive only thing that's on a young motherfucking n***a mind
Damn
[Hook]
Try to make a hit off this anguish that I claim
I put my life inside these lyrics hoping that you can see my pain
With all this agony I feel, I think that I'm going insane
To live forever through the music that's all that I want to attain
FUCK !
I guess it all depends on a mindstate that a young motherfucker n***a's really in DAMN! (3x)
I sit with my thoughts
The page and the pen
I write about life and how it all ends